so I’m driving up to the City and I finally see it… and I actually thought “ah, finally home!”

…then I remembered Atlanta Traffic and quickly snapped back to what I was doing…

It feels good to be back, and it’s only been one day.  Looking back (I’ve said this plenty of times before)… I’m not sure why I left!  I’ve got a nice relaxing day today before I get into anything… but knowing me, I won’t wait much.

I look forward to going home to finalize my plans to come home.

PS: Thanks to Christine for this link:
http://kotaku.com/5037975/parents-let-kid-drop-out-of-high-school-to-focus-on-guitar-hero

I truely hope someday you learn to:

• Keep your mouth shut while you’re ahead. (and recognize you’re ahead)
• Listen to what somebody else has to say.
• Have patience.
• Acknowledge there might be something going on that, while not more important, is taking momentary priority over you.

Course, I’m starting to notice that no matter how many times I truely hope these things happen… they don’t…

*sigh*

(2:01:39 PM) Sean: Ever notice when Serj from system of a down sings really fast and deep.
(2:01:45 PM) Sean: He sounds like Kermit the frog?
(2:01:55 PM) Luke: . . . are you on drugs?
(2:02:04 PM) Sean: Nope.
(2:02:18 PM) Sean: Maybe, I dunno.
(2:03:37 PM) Luke: maybe?
(2:04:26 PM) Sean: Is coffee a drug?
(2:04:34 PM) Luke: a legal one \o/
(2:04:41 PM) Sean: Then yes.
(2:05:35 PM) Luke: (I’m on Alcohol)
(2:05:43 PM) Sean: Im on your face.
(2:05:44 PM) Sean: Bitch.
(2:06:00 PM) Luke: …you’re addicted to my face?
(2:07:31 PM) Sean: No
(2:07:35 PM) Sean: Just on it.
(2:07:39 PM) Sean: -undulates-
(2:07:46 PM) Luke: so you’re like… chewing on my face?
(2:08:34 PM) Sean: I AM MAKING A SEXUAL JOKE ABOUT YOU GIVING ME A MUSTACHE RIDE YOU FUCKING JEW.
(2:08:38 PM) Sean: I mean.
(2:08:47 PM) Sean: Yes?
(2:09:09 PM) Luke: you’re giving a mustache ride to a jew fucking?
(2:09:43 PM) Sean: …I am so close to telling you to get to the back of the oven…

http://rachellucas.com/index.php/2008/08/13/the-only-thing-i-feel-sorry-for-these-people-about-is-that-they-were-born-stupid/

Shit like that makes me so infuriated that I want to kill politicians who want to save these fucking retarded people.  You don’t refinance your home every year, you do it every decade.  This isn’t sad, it’s fraud.

Then, after the financing scam they seemed to have been running, it seems like they are getting paid to move out instead of sued and kicked out.

This some BULLSHIT!

it’s never been brought to my attention that I overthink, causing me to underact.  Something pops into my frawn, I sit down and think about it for days/weeks/worse… and then I’m so exhausted with it that I cease attempts to follow through with any of it.  It’s not that I don’t want to do it still, I just decide to take a break from it to think of other things.

Then something else pops up and I start thinking of that instead.

Vicious Cycle… huh?

Somewhere along the line in the last 8 months I’ve had a mostly recurring daydream that I won the Lottery.  Having only played the lottery probably 3 or 4 times since the ripe old age of 18, I’m not sure why I’d start now… or even dream of it.  It’s a fun distraction for a day or 2 if you buy a ticket… but, deep down, you know you’re going to lose.  But the dream kept coming, so I went and did a little research over the last 8 months and was kinda surprised what I found:

1) That humongo 50 million?
That’s in installments over the next 30 years here in Florida… you have a Cash Option (which 90% of winners take) which gives you roughly half the winnings.

2) so now you have 25 million?
More  then 50% of lottery winners experience a condition referred to as SWS (Sudden Wealth Syndrom)… since they never had money to begin with, they don’t know how to go about spending it.  MORE then 50% of lottery winners take less then 5 years to return to “Ground Zero”… or worse, it drives away their friends and family who become money grubbers and they’re left alone, with less then you started with.

3) You’re now public scam target #1.
When you win the lottery they will give your name and City of residence (but not address or Phone #) to any 3rd party requesting it.  Your 25 million in cash is incredibly savory to many scam artists and people looking for investment capital (who may or may not be scam artists).  Almost 10% of people who win jackpots over 10 million are chased down and buy into “Get Rich Quick” schemes… even though they just got rich about as fast as they could…

4) Your the life of the party?
Your friends, family, random people… they want to be your friend… they want a chunk of the action should you meet your untimely demise.  Your will, which previously included your 5 year old dog/cat, maybe a house, and your car, becomes a golden tablet.  You’re a meal ticket waiting to croak.  There are even stories of family members hiring hitmen to have the winner offed so they can collect… shiesty…

5) So now you’re affraid of your friends and family?
Congrats… you’re alone.  Can’t buy family, and you can only rent friends.

SWS is a depression apparently.  You didn’t have it before, you don’t think you deserve it now, and nobody around you has it… you begin to wonder if that’s right and slip into a depression.  There’s a mediocre Wikipedia article on the subject, but I’m lazy and not looking it up.

One winner of the largest lottery to date lost the most important thing, his granddaughter.  She spent her (rather lofty) allowence on drugs weekly, $2000/week… that’s alot of drugs.  When he cut her off, she was found in a gutter.  He was arrested several times for drinking and driving and apparently public violence things… and that $198 million in cash (yes, that was half the jackpot)?  A decade later it’s all gone… and he wishes he had never won it in the first place.  He did spend some money to do good things originally… he built a few churches, cleaned up a bad neighborhood… but I guess it eventually consumed him.

Very sad.

…I’m done…

I had an incredibly humongo conversation with my best friend where he basically told me something, I replied dumbly, and he backhanded me… rinse repeat that like 10 or so times…

not literally backhanded me, but in that uber fun verbal sense that only friends really do for you

So now that we’re past that step I need to start making steps on this side of the court… otherwise I’m actually going to be physically sick from the levels of bullshit I’ve recently had to endure… which I’ve already felt the physical press of to be honest, I was just trying to ignore it…

rarely do I talk about my dreams (the actual ones that involve me sleeping), but last night I woke up in the middle of one that was just weird and remembered almost every detail.  There was some sort of yellow octopus (with 7 legs) who could walk like a spider/octopus mix on land, it’s legs were like 6 feet long each… it would hide in canopies and drop down onto unsuspecting things underneath it… for some reason I was under it with somebody, it came down and my leg got caught in it’s grasp, as I was trying to pull away it changed target from the person it was holding to me and crawled up onto me…

I don’t know how, but I actually, physically, reacted in real life and slammed my head into the headboard.  My leg instantly developed a cramp.  And I was then in pain on 2 ends of my body.

Fun dream huh?

In any sort of other news this is basically my last day in PA.  Time to go home to Florida for a very short time before I reverse direction and go to Atlanta for abit.

I hadn’t been posting on LJ or even here cause I got sick of playing Copy-Paste jobs… but then I remembered I never installed the LJ CrossPoster that Chris so nicely sent me.

That’s fixed now.

Expect more blogging in the future.

…end of line…

I have now been stuck in the Poconos for almost 2 weeks now… it’s not that I mind the Poconos, it’s actually quite tranquil up here, but I really just want to go home.

It’s mostly because of dad at this time… but there are other reasons as well.  This trip, aside from causing massive stress, probably was the final blow to my relationship with Christal.  I stick by the decision I made, for better or worse, because that’s what I do.  But I guess I’ll always wonder.

I’m ready to accept just about any deadend cubical job at this point.  If anybody forwards one to me, I get accepted, I’m there.  I don’t even care much for location of the job itself, I’m pretty willing to move ALMOST (I stress I won’t move to just) anywhere.  Atlanta would be great… definately, without a doubt, first choice… but I’m pretty open to suggestions for anywhere else.

“Obama backer Morgan Freeman hospitalized”

…wtf?  he got in a car wreck… who cares who he’s voting for?

Here’s some winners I made:

if you click on the purple one, I made a quick vid you can download.

Can’t wait to see everybody elses.

I would challenge anybody who wants Universal Healthcare to do one of 2 things:

1) Move to a Country that has it.
I know a few people who spent time in the UK, when a business partner of mine was diagnosed with a form of Colon Cancer, they kept it a secret for as long as possible.  Had they begun receiving care through the “Universal Healthcare” system in the UK, they would’ve been waitlisted for theropy there, and unable to obtain private Healthcare when they returned to the states.  When they got back, and redeemed their US Portion of their Dual Citizenship, they got care here… and paid for it out of pocket.

2) Join the Military.
For anybody who’s served (like me), you KNOW that Universal Healthcare can be very bad.  In the Military, you get waitlisted for just about any medical reason… You go and wait in the hospital for hours for the simplist of problems.  I recall a time when I had an inner ear infection, and it caused a throbbing migraine.  During the time in the waiting room (5.5 Hours) I heard the news several times over and another gentleman’s life story.  When I finally got to my examination room I waited another 2 Hours… finally when they actually got around to examining me, it was about 15 minutes before they subscribed a medication.

For those who haven’t served: You can’t get those medications from WalGreens or CVS or whatever you have.  You have to get them from a Authorized center… another waiting line (where you have to stand this time) for them to fill the subscription…

Total time for that: 9 hours.
Total time for a similar Civilian style experience: 35 minutes.

Becoming a Doctor is not easy or cheap.  If you wonder why they make so much money, it’s because they spend 7-10 years in school, another 1-4 in a Residency Program, then your first 2-5 years picking up scraps from a Doctor who’s established.  That’s 2 decades before you can actually make money…

If you’ve been to college, you know how expensive it can be.  Doctors easily do 2x what the average kid does in college, and have to find the money to pay for it, and the money to survive.  It’s all for the promise of a return later in life.

A return that, under Universal Healthcare, will be slashed in half or less.

Keep in mind, under “Universal Healthcare”, you can’t get a “2nd Opinion” or go to a “Different Doctor”… it’s a state run institution, you get what you get, and that’s it.  You don’t get choices… I think somebody said it earlier: it’ll be like the DMV, only for Medicine.

Where’s the money coming from for this dream system?  Taxes… your taxes, ready for the tax hike?

And it’s not like people will have Medical Insurance anymore if we get Universal Healthcare.  Company’s will drop Health/Dental plans like a bad habit if we have a “Free” government run plan… why would a company pay out of pocket?
Did anybody mention the millions of Americans that work for Medical Insurance and Billing companies yet?  Yup, they’re out of a job…

My last note:

Under Universal Healthcare, I would rather pay twice out of pocket for a Private Doctor I chose, then deal with the “Qualified” yahoo they issue me in those centers.

I’m havign one of those mornings where I wake up and an awake regardless.  Nothing I do at this point will quell the fact I’m awake and can’t get back to sleep…

So I’m thinking, on this Memorial Day, about the few short years I spent in the service and the things I did in my off time while there:

in 2000 I didn’t really have “off time”… I went to Gurney Mills Mall a few times I had off with my buddy David.

In 2001 I had more time off, 2001 and 2002 kind of blur together… spent most of it wandering around base and in the Internet Lab.  Saw a movie every weekend, hung out at the NEX (Navy Exchange), that was really about it.  I’d drive up to my Cousin’s house for holidays in PA with the Extended Family.

2002 I remember the most.  I had made these 2 friends (David and Ralph) and they actually took me places in town.  They were locals and were quite nice.  Lots of console gaming and coffee runs.  They let me stay at their place most nights…

2003 I remember I spent half the year out to sea… the other half I spent in my first Apt.  Ahh, my first Apt.  Computers, Beers, TV, GameCube, Cable… played MMOs for most the time… 2003 was when I started getting into the actual “science” behind gaming.  But remembering it is another story… I didn’t really DO anything except work and go back to my Apt.  Same with 2004.

Looking back I have very few memories that really “pop” out in my mind.  Playing some XBox with Ralph and David sticks out… getting my first apt and trying to furnish it…  A few unplanned trips out of the area where I’d say to David “if I don’t return avenge death” that I no longer talk about…

Just goes to show you, I can be a very boring person.

I try to be honest about this:

There are some topics I don’t like talking about.

Normally, like 99.9% of the time, I’ll straight out tell you I don’t want to talk about them. The 2nd time you bring it up I might try to change the topic, hoping you remember by my avoidance. If you bring it up that 3rd time, I get quite annoyed.

… if this all happens in one conversation within an hour … I’ll often have to leave the room to do something. I normally go downstairs and play with the dog or give kitten scratches, talk with mom about some current event, things like that.

If I avoid a topic online, it’s a hint I’m really not in the mood to talk about it. Want a hot tip though?

I’m infinitely more likely to talk about those things in person then I am online.

. . . and that doesn’t mean the phone, because everybody knows I hate the phone to begin with. . .

SO, if you’re talking to me, and trying to find out something, and the frequency of “brb” spikes and I’m obviously trying to frantically change the topic… perhaps you should put that in the “ask later” category.

IN OTHER NEWS

Harry has taken to snapping. Snapping at hands, legs, crotches. . . and most noteably faces. As he snapped at mine and put 2 holes in it. One is just shy of stitches.

My hand with him will be getting far firmer starting today. Time for this puppy to grow up a bit, and learn right from wrong.

it’s really not their fault… let me start by saying that…

That said:
I hate the Dentist.

“Let me stick 3 fingers in your mouth and ask you how your summer is going.”  How do you respond?
“Can you feel this?”  Course I can… MORE Novacaine!
“hmm… I don’t know…” What am I paying you this much for then?
“it just feels like you’re drooling” then why is my shirt wet?
“We’ll do some work on B5?” Can you call C17 or D9?
“Don’t eat or drink anything for the next 2-3 hours.” that’s my favorite… they schedule you at 11am on purpose so you miss lunch and then start starving

When you get a cavity, the first thing they do is widden it so they can fill it.

Prior to that, they numb it up real nicelike… I felt continually bad because I was (and still am) so numb I couldn’t tell my mouth was just naturally closing on their fingers and instruments.  So I kept slackjawing out a “soey” (read: sorry) to the guy and his assistant.

When they got done they were “adjusting” and shaving, they said “bite down on this” (I’m going to assume it was some sort of marking paper) and I (thought) I bit down… course they said it again and I tried harder to bite down when he kindly assisted with me closing my mouth… how embarrassing is THAT?

The worst part I think was the moment I thought to myself:
“If I get pulled over on the way home… I’m either screwed or will get off the hook.”

hopefully I won’t have to go again for like a year…

http://blog.wired.com/games/2008/05/gta4-actor-decr.html

I wholeheartedly agree with Rockstar’s reply:

“Among their executives, one real fear is that if they start paying royalties to a handful of actors, they will soon face similar demands from the legions of artists, designers, audio producers, musicians, programmers and other people who work for years to make a top-end game.”

Who deserves it more? Some pipsqueek who spoke a few lines (I can easily replace you buddy… probably for free!) or the actual game makers?

I feel like I spend most evenings sitting and waiting for that day’s shows to popup to download…

Monday:
American Gladiators.

Tuesday:
Reaper, Hell’s Kitchen.

Wednesday:
None right now…

Thursday:
So You Think You Can Dance (might FoD instead)

Friday:
Battlestar Galactica, StarGate Atlantis

Saturday:
None right now…

Sunday:
Simpsons, Family Guy, American Dad

Good times!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vbnySBqioB0

Second Life prank spills over… looks like he made a crack at it at the end though.

First off:

So I come here to write out blog posts about 2 weeks ago and the whole site was giving errors… I have no idea what fixed it, but it seems to be working now.  About 2 weeks ago I was going to start my “Screenie A Day” campaign on here… of course that’s now gone by the wayside, and I’m on to other things this week… maybe I’ll get motivated to do it later.

Birthday

yes, yesterday was my birthday.  It was quite fun.

On top of Christal being here to spend it with me, I also got to open the day up with seeing Iron Man!  It was awesome.  We went to a noon showing of the Digital Theatre.
By the way - if you didn’t stay for the credits, there was a scene with Nick Fury at the end of the credit’s rolling.  If you missed it, go YouTube it or something.

For my birthday, I got a new Keyboard and Mouse.
The keyboard is a 3 piece split keyboard.  It’s literally in 3 pieces… it’s much easier on the shoulders for typers who do mucho amounts of typing daily.
The Mouse is a Logitech G9 Laser Gaming Mouse… best on the market.

Both are still taking alot of getting used to.

I purchased myself Mario Kart Wii, and an extra Racing Wheel.  Been having alot of fun with that this week with Christal.

Then last night I took Christal, Nick, and Maggie (Nick’s girlfriend) to the melting Pot… which is mm mm good!

No real plans for the rest of the week… going to have to wing it abit… probably more Mario Kart, and some Giants hopefully.  Till Friday anyways, then it’s the party times.

More as this story develops.

So a few weeks back I signed up for Mythos Beta… expecting to be in a long list of people and never get in, I forgot about it.

Yesterday I got my acceptance to the Beta… so I downloaded it real fast and Logged in.

Great game.  I’m probably going to spend most the day playing it.  Will Post some pictures (I know I’m not supposed to, rot in hell).

I shit you not!

http://media.movies.ign.com/articles/866/866861/vids_1.html

Red Blood

Green Blood

More Red Blood

More Green Blood

Nuclear Bomb

…overall 2 thumbs up, saved by a phenomenal ending!